So, you want to know how to become Instagram? OK, you’ve come to the right place, because after that Twenty minutes Thousands of hours of very intense research and research on Instagram exploration pages, we finally broke the formula of Instafamous.
It’s super complicated, but fortunately for you, we’ve divided it into 7 easy-to-follow steps to help you get on the road to appealing to help, get free dresses in emails, and end up being able to call yourself an influencer.
Let’s provide a complete disclaimer – Being Instafamous is not about walking in the park. It involves telling all your followers how you actually work, using hashtags like #CoupleGoals, and making sure you respond to every comment you receive to Love Heart extra Emojis.
Actually, it’s a full-time job. Do you think you can handle it?
I’m going to be famous for Instagram!
If you think you are facing a challenge, you will have a big number next to your name on the app and be able to tell your grandchildren once upon a time, you are also Kardashian – known for not actually doing anything substantial.
Without further ado, here is our revolutionary and very detailed guide on how to become Instagram famous.
Step 1 – Become a young, beautiful couple
We have bad news for you – if you are not young, tall and thin, you will never be Instagram. If you look like a regular person, or have a little beer gut, it’s time to give up on your dream of becoming an Instafamous, maybe consider it Start a travel blog.
But if you do have abs like a washboard, long blonde hair and a blond tan, that’s half. Now you just need to find an equally beautiful partner (and don’t mind showing off your body like you, ideally, wearing very few clothes).
Congratulations! You are lucky enough to have the first attribute known on Instagram without actually doing anything else, and are born with good genes and registered with Crossfit Gym. Now is the next time to become Instafamous.
Note: If you can’t find one conceited As gorgeous as you, never worry about it and still have the chance to become famous on Instagram. You just have to post a lot of photos of yourself with puppies inside.
Step 2 – Move to Bali
Ah, yes, Bali. Instagram invented the place purely for traveling couples to move in, eat Buddha bowls and register to overpriced colleague spaces.
The truth is, if you don’t live in Bali, you can’t be Instafamous. Statistically impossible. I mean, if you don’t post $20 floating breakfast photos every other day, how do you expect to get all these likes and comments?
After exiting the 6-digit job in public relations, you need to get a one-way ticket to Bali so that you can get one from your new Instagram career.
Rent a private villa with a swimming pool in Canngu (or maybe Ubud) (but it’s just to tell everyone how you connect with the spirituality there), spend time sharing photos of your laptop on Instagram stories so that your followers know you’re actually “working” and then start shooting at sunset and start shooting!
First, it will be hard because you have to take pictures on a waterfall with hundreds of other Instagram couples, hanging from swings in palm trees and rice fields (did you know that Balinese people are actually those rice fields built for Instagrammers?), but you end up with 10 photos, but you will be able to use in different postures and angles so that you can flood.
Step 3 – Love!
You have successfully moved to Bali with your sexy AF partner and are now ready to move toward Instagram’s famous third step – let the whole world know you’re in love!
It’s time to start getting those great shots, and the other couples are in trouble only hope they can do it on social media. The trick is to keep hugging each other, or reach out your partner’s hands, or stare at each other’s floating breakfast.
This will take a lot of practice, and in the early stages you may have to learn to use a tripod because you can’t afford a full-time photographer to follow you, but stick with it because #CoupleGoals.
The point is to make every couple in the world feel less than you. I mean, if they don’t look as good as yours and can’t nail the same 5 modeling pose, then they might also get divorced, right? Anyway, what do they even do on Instagram? Oh yes, follow you because you are instafamous.
Step 4 – Make some presets almost Exactly the same as everyone else
OK, you have a collection of Gram pictures that you can post to the world, but there is only one problem – they look a little lame.
Never be afraid! Fortunately, Lightroom preset saves a day here.
The first thing you need to do is buy some presets from another Instagram couple. They will give your photos a fantastic effect when you click a button, which will make your feed fully lit up.
They are now slightly adjusted. Enough so that you can call it yourself. Save them, only these presets are available. You are always bothering them now. That’s your brand, and it makes no sense to try new things.
You are not finished yet! You can’t just throw away the photos you want Willy Nilly. Are you crazy? No, you have to carefully curate the grid, plan at least 18 photos ahead of time so that you know the order in which you want to upload and keep the mint view. A wrong upload and you are back to work in the office.
https://www.instagram.com/p/beux8gfa2p-
Step 5 – Write the title of “Inspiring”
“When you can’t fall asleep, you know you’re in love because reality is finally better than your dream.”
“Being deeply loved by someone will give you strength, and loving someone will give you courage.”
“When I’m with you, the stars are brighter.”
Ah, I just read those cute dovey subtitles and get all the feelings! all. dem. Feel.
The next step is to learn how to write subtitles to make your love for each other stronger and more realistic than anyone else on Earth. Because it is.
But you also don’t want to alienate your followers, because without them you won’t get any dress sponsors, so make sure you bravely escape all the titles you have in your first world middle class life after putting two investment properties on Airbnb.
Don’t forget to mention occasionally that you argue with your soulmate every now and then, because you’re just an ordinary couple, too, but then you can make up for it soon, because life is too short to bear resentment and love for each other is greater than the universe. Oh, why can’t every relationship be so magical? Insert love emoji.
https://www.instagram.com/p/bflivf-gowg
Step 6 – Go to Instagrammable only
You should have at least 50,000 followers so far (if you don’t, go buy more floating breakfasts, yo!), and it’s time to take the biggest step in your new career and start your adventure outside of Bali.
But where to go? Um….
The next secret to being Instafamous is to go to only countries that guarantee Instagram worth mentioning. I’m talking about the waterfalls in the Philippines. Hot air balloons in Cappadocia. Morocco and its dunes and blue city Ch.. Chahs…Chahs…Chahs…Chahof, ah, what does it mean, just make sure you pack a yellow dress.
Quickly head to India and also visit the Taj Mahal. Guaranteed to like it there.
Holy nonsense, do you know? You just cracked 100,000 followers! Congratulations, you are Instafamous! Happy days, let’s do a little dance (make sure you record it on the Insta story and say you wouldn’t be where you are today without your love for your anonymous followers on the app).
But you are not done yet. It’s time to solidify yourself in the Instagram Couples Hall of Fame. It’s time to head to the Maldives!
Wait, what? Isn’t the Maldives expensive? I know what you are talking about – you can’t afford it. But never worry, a rare member of my Insta tribe. You will get some resort sponsorships that they are desperate to show how they are.
If you are really lucky, you might even be invited to that place in Africa where giraffes walk through windows and try to steal breakfast. Thank God, others are paying because breakfast is not cheap. Revolutionary.
Once you have a circular action around the world, don’t be cautious about setting foot on a country that won’t enrich your online participation, you can return to Bali and start planning the exact same trip over and over again.
https://www.instagram.com/p/bi1fcpxgy9k
Step 7 – Sell your preset and call yourself an entrepreneur
Until now, you’ve come across a harsh truth – Instagram doesn’t actually have an app that pays them every day. In fact, they won’t make any difference to you.
And, even if you pretend that the airline sponsors you every step, all of these flights you just bought cost more than you are willing to admit. While free dresses are good, they don’t pay the Buddha Bowl bill or work together space membership.
So, how do you get rich now with the new Instafame?
Remember those presets you made a few months ago? Start selling them like crazy! Mention them in every post and Insta story you post. Hell even formed a new account and tag for them. Because nothing can scream originality and creativity like making the masses scream, making their photos look exactly the same as yours.
Now you have (not literally) Thousands of dollars roll to supplement your Airbnb revenue, it’s time to start calling yourself a public figure or entrepreneur because that’s a buzzword that everyone wants to be a buzzword.
Congratulations, sexy travel couple – you are now officially instafamous!
Prepare for the future
Who knows what will happen in the future? Probably short-lived YouTube Channel (Until you realize that making a video is difficult and time-consuming and requires that you are actually able to string sentences together) Then you will get married, have kids, and try to copy Bucket List lankes.
In the end, Instagram will be replaced by the next big social media platform (What happened to Myspace and Vine anyway?)but you will deny too much to act in time. Soon, you’ll be outdated, but that’s OK, because you’re always able to say that you used to be famous on Interwebz because they’re young and pretty, and do the exact same thing in Instagram couples.
If everything else fails and you don’t have an idea, you can always be a travel blog…
If you like our guide on how to be Instagram, make sure you Swing through our own Instagram account and give us a followYes, we’re a little attracted to it, but we don’t take our advice, so you may not see us wearing bikini poses or taking pictures of floating breakfasts. Oh, we don’t live in Bali. sorry.
This article was a joke, and by no means a personal attack on any particular person, couple or Instagrammer. If you are triggered by this, please don’t take life so seriously…
